GRAND RAPIDS, Mich (WOTV) — You and your guy have been together for a few years. You’re crazy about each other, met the parents, gone on vacation together and most importantly, you are extremely happy. So, where’s the ring? Playing the waiting game for a marriage proposal can be frustrating, disheartening, and can make you feel helpless. Here are five tips to help cope when waiting for the ring:
Don’t give an ultimatum or a deadline
A gentle nudge or verbally stating that you’re ready to get married is one thing, but putting pressure and giving ultimatums is a no-no. Pushing someone into marriage before they’re ready is an issue that can linger. At the end of the day, you want the proposal to be something that he wants and is sure about too. Listen to why your partner has cold feet about getting married, and it may make you more understanding and patient. A guilt trip or forcing someone into marriage isn’t right.
Don’t be discourage, enjoy dating!
There may be a time in your relationship when you ask yourself, “Is this ever going to happen?”, which is normal. However, use this time to enjoy being together! Marriage brings a whole new set of headaches and you’ll look back fondly on your simple days of being boyfriend and girlfriend. It can be hard to enjoy the present when you’re so excited about you future, but try to remain happy and positive.
Reassess why you want to get married
Is it for the beautiful wedding and princess dress or because you feel like you’re too old to be single? These are not the right reasons. It’s easy to get so wrapped up in the excitement of the idea of a wedding that you lose sight of why you want to get married to your partner. If love, children, mutual morals and beliefs are part of why you want to get married, then you’re waiting for the right reason. Use this time to work on your mental and physical health.
Does your partner eventually want the same thing?
Marriage may not be a priority for your partner, and that’s OK. But if it’s important to you, that’s when it becomes a problem. If you know what you want, and he’s just not marriage bound, you may need to move on and find the commitment elsewhere. A successful marriage is rooted in wanting the same things in life, this leads to a lot less problems down the road.
Long engagements don’t mean happy marriages
If your partner is not ready for marriage, the engagement alone won’t make them, either. Get to the core of what’s really happening, and find out how it can be solved.